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Attachment, feeling safe and secure
In this chapter we examine the secure loving attachment between Orson and Mum. We take an holistic look at how a secure attachment really supports and is integral to healthy development and how his emotional development is becoming regulated. We see him happy at this stage to be left with a stranger.Good for looking at
- Attachment
- Brain development
- Emotional regulation
- Babies
- Parents
- 00:07
- The crucial thing that happens
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- in a baby's development is they begin
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- to make a very special relationship with their carers
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- and that's known as attachment
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- and attachment has got a great deal to do
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- with how we feel safe and secure in our environment
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- and it begins right back in these early months of our lives
- 00:30
- when we begin to make those relationships with our carers
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- and it's specifically about how our carers respond
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- to us, and in particular, how they deal with our distress.
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- They get to know that somebody at some point
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- is going to come and sort them out
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- and soothe them and comfort them
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- and that's how attachment, which is
- 00:52
- a biological process, really, which is to do
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- with feelings of closeness and security,
- 00:58
- actually begins to form.
- 00:60
- This secure attachment relationship
- 01:02
- and advancing development in the brain
- 01:04
- helps Orson begin to manage his emotions himself.
- 01:09
- Through the consistent and sensitive responsiveness
- 01:12
- of the parents, Orson learns that it's all right
- 01:15
- to show his feelings when he's distressed,
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- frightened, or angry, and that his parents
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- will help him regulate these feelings if they overwhelm him.
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- His prefrontal cortex learns to control
- 01:27
- the emotional impulses in a balanced way
- 01:30
- so that he can feel his feelings,
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- but they won't run away with him.
- 01:35
- He cries while sitting with his family.
- 01:42
- They try to comfort him.
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- What's up?
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- What's a matter?
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- Do you wanna cry?
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- Time for cuddle.
- 01:56
- But he manages it on his own
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- by sucking his finger.
- 02:01
- Are these from your set?
- 02:03
- Uh-huh.
- 02:04
- Well, they look like a saw.
- 02:06
- Most of the time, he's now able
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- to get himself off to sleep.
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- Of course, he'll still need a lot of help and support
- 02:14
- for a long time, but slowly, he'll become
- 02:17
- more independent and be able to manage
- 02:19
- more and more situations himself.
- 02:26
- At six months, although Orson has a preference for mum,
- 02:29
- he's generally sociable with other people
- 02:32
- and he's happy to be left with a stranger.
- 02:34
- Look.
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- Put that one inside.
- 02:38
- You want to go to Allison while I go to the toilet?
- 02:41
- Come on, then.
- 02:42
- Oh, he's a big boy, eh?
- 02:45
- Shall we have a look at this, eh?
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- Yeah, what have we got here?
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- That's on there.
- 02:56
- When mum returns, Orson is still happy
- 02:58
- to sit and play with Allison.
- 02:60
- There, ray!
- 03:02
- You've done it.
- 03:04
- You took it out.
- 03:09
- You been playing?
- 03:10
- You were a clever boy, weren't you?
- 03:13
- Yeah?
- 03:14
- I don't know how clean this is, I'm sure.
- 03:24
- The way Orson is learning about the world
- 03:27
- is largely mediated by communication
- 03:30
- from and with his mum and dad.
- 03:32
- They're communicating with each other
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- in a rich holistic way.
- 03:37
- This is enabling him to make sense
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- of the varied experiences they've provided for him.
- 03:43
- They've given him objects to find out about,
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- sensations to experience, and varied games
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- to be involved in.
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- He can now sit up, can grasp, and is investigating
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- objects and their properties.
- 03:58
- He's eating solid food,
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- experiencing new textures and tastes.
- 04:03
- He's forming an attachment to his mum and dad
- 04:06
- because of their sensitivity to his needs
- 04:09
- and their caring responses, giving him
- 04:11
- a sense of emotional security.
- 04:15
- It's the repeated day-to-day experiences
- 04:18
- we've seen with mum and dad that enables
- 04:20
- the brain to gradually put together all
- 04:22
- the physical and psychological messages
- 04:25
- in an integrated way.